reason to wake up

I think people need a reason to wake up in the morning... to boast the spirit and to at least understand a lil bit why she/he somehow ever exist in this world.

And in my case, it has never been easy to actually find "reason" to seize the day. Indeed this life is full of shits!
My recent life been full of routine... and hence I'm gonna kill that routine very soon. A friend told me this morning with an irony "ahhh..young and retired, seems a beautiful life." ... and last night my brother and sister were so confused when I told them "well I don't know.. I don't have a plan really.." and... they tried to help me out with the solutions 'cos they thought I'm totally out of my mind... by resigning from my current job with literally NO PLAN!

Every morning for the last one and half year, I've been waking up with such a hurry and far from "healthy mind" and "good rest" and thinking about deadline and such... well that's how it is when people grow up and have a job that binding her/him... i have responsibility as a writer or journalist to do what the journalist should do...

Yet, I think I need to know my limit and capability as well, I need to know when I have to hold thing and when I have to make a move... I need to know whether things are supporting my ability or just holding it back... and the fact is I don't want to stuck in a point just because I feel comfortable as it has been a routine for me... and... going nowhere.

I want to wake up with a new hope... with a new perspective that will lead me to the higher stage of my life and my career... We have to take a risk for once in our lives... especially when we know that it will change our lives toward the better...

I'm not retired... I just need to wake up in the morning with alter reasons...