macem ape...

susahnye nyari duit tu...


[gosh] have u ever felt so unmotivated on doing something ? ur job for instance ?
if you haven't been on that shoes, I'll tell you... it feels like SH** seriously...
all u get by the end of the day is merely this fatigue and left a hollow sphere within your soul
my dad told me this morning when he took me to the airport, to quit my job 'coz he could see that I'm no longer enjoying my activities... my job as a writer in this so and so company, which is TRUE.
telling the truth I'm just waiting a "right" momentum to tender my resignation letter... not really care what am I going to do next hehehe, don't really get bother about it. I don't mind to just sit and talk with my mom back home in Yogyakarta, yeah seriously I think I can live with that after years of whirl-winding emotions. I deserve a break... the fine one please.

I read Chinese prophecy this afternoon, it is based on our Shio or the year we were born, mine is Monkey. It says that this year I have to be careful and be more aware of my surrounded, there are many back stabber who are love to tackle me and to see me suffer. I was wondering this prophecy must be one year late! This last two years I've been very familiar with these back stabber people, they are around me... Always say something sweet, innocent, and such, yet they do things that hurt me a lot behind my back and smile so politely and nicely in front of me like I know nothing about what they've been doing. So shameful and disrespect indeed... all I could say is: What goes around comes around. I have always believed that we ALWAYS i mean always have to pay for hat we do, whether it is good or bad. Yes, I do believe in Karma.

Respect is not something that you gain... but it is something that you earn.

well, I may once in my life have done something dreadful toward others, hence people who I consider as my inner circle keep hurting me on and on again, I don't know which are more stupid in this case, me or them... me as I still have more and more space to forgive them and giving them chances by chances to improve or them who keep falling in the same whole over and over again. what a life.

So the bottom line is: I'm fed up with my job, so sick with these back stabbers and yet life has to move on.
guess it'll be great to have someone, yes i only need ONE person who is sincere and pure...
I hope that Allah still keep that person save for me... AMIEN.